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“If I Told You To Pack Up And Go…”

Hi! My name is Christian, or “Chrissy” for short. I like to go by Chrissy, I think it’s more fun haha. I was born in Flint, MI but then my family and I relocated to Amite, LA, the summer of 2003. I’m sure you can imagine the move being quite an experience…. sheesh! Anywho, fast forward to life now, I am a Louisiana Tech University graduate and I am about to embark on my first ,very abrupt, journey to Savannah, GA. Needless to say, I’m scared.

First off, I do believe in Jesus. However, my post is not a sermon. It is a story that the Lord is weaving in my life. This summer, I had the opportunity to go to Cambodia. Cambodia is in southeast Asia, btw, not Africa. I went with the ministry group that I’d been apart of for a little over a year now. We planned to be there for a month, but unfortunately, we were only there for a week and half. Some of our team got sick with a bacterial infection. I was devastated. You see, I had completely fallen in love with that place. But not because it was beautiful, although it most definitely was/is. I fell in love with Cambodia because that was where and when I actually saw and experienced God for myself. WAIT!! Before you roll your eyes and click the back arrow to read something else, please continue reading.

Since being back in America, I’ve struggled to figure out why I felt/feel so strongly about Cambodia. Why has it been so difficult to talk about, write about? For weeks, I cried myself to sleep and attempted many, many times to find documentaries, movies, videos, just anything that would fill the void. Of course, nothing sufficed. I didn’t talk about it much. I kept it in a whole lot. And that wasn’t the best idea because I started to harbor hurt and anger towards people. (Not okay)

When I say that I experienced and saw God in Cambodia, I’m saying that the Lord revealed something to me there. I thought for a fact that what he was revealing to me had everything to do with Cambodia, but it didn’t. What He revealed to me had everything to do with my obedience to HIM. I think sometimes as followers and disciples of Christ, we can make the mistake of getting attached to the place where God takes us to and/or where He reveals Himself to us, instead of paying attention to and being aware of Him! There’s nothing wrong with remembering that particular time and place and holding it dear, but there is something wrong with paying more respect and virtue to the creaTED or to the creaTURE rather than the creaTOR.

I now realize that I was as  hurt and as angry as I was because I made the mistake of feeling like I had been stripped of a full experience that I somewhat felt entitled to and felt like needed to and could have only happened there. I didn’t know it then, but not only was I limiting God, but I was also missing what the Lord was trying to get me to see. Sure, it was a shame that we had to leave early, but God still did such incredible things. He was so present on that trip. He was literally all around us! It was hard and sad and frustrating, but it was so good and fruitful in so many ways. Thank you Jesus.

I said all of that to say that I had applied for the Wesley Foundation ministry internship back in January. But I recently asked for permission to be released from that position. It was a crazy difficult decision that I had been wrestling with for months. It was difficult because that meant me leaving all of my family both here in Ruston and in Amite.

Three weeks after our return to America, the Lord asked me in church, clear as day, “If I told you to pack up and follow me, would you?” Immediately, I said yes and began to scribble down questions. Of course, I thought He was telling me that He was taking me back to Cambodia… smh. I now know that that wasn’t it. I missed it again but praise the Lord for God’s grace! I never had the desire to move to Georgia. I’ve only been there once when I was a kid. I don’t know why the Lord is leading me there and especially at a time such as this, but I do know that He asked the question and I said yes. I am scared out of my mind. And I don’t know what I’m doing, but that’s okay because He does. So, just like the title says, I am packing up and I am going wherever He leads. Right now it’s Savannah, but…

 

I still want to go back to Cambodia. haha

And maybe one day I will 🙂 😉

 

Thanks for reading!!!